I'm naturally a depressive/anxious person - for the last several months I'd moved out finally to a place of my own and really enjoyed the peace and freedom. But I'd always said since I was younger that I wanted to get a cat (We had one for about 2 years when I was a kid), and figured getting one now would give me more affection and something better to focus on than my own thoughts all the time.
I delayed getting the cat for quite a bit out of anxiety, but after feeling the pressure both from myself and from those I kept telling I was going to, I went ahead and finally did so 5 days ago from the HS.
Since then, I've been getting really depressed though, in bursts. He's very clingy, which is great sometimes because having a cat purring on your lap is great, but it becomes too much when it's just constantly running around the house, stressed out and meowing at nothing because he's not used to the place, and randomly jumping onto (or into) everything. I don't like having to constantly be staring over my shoulder and tensed up worrying about him.
I figured that getting a cat would just be a case of playing with em for like 30 minutes, twice a day, then they would laze around the rest of it and be calm/sweet. And maybe that'll happen eventually, but it's definitely not the case right now. I'm really starting to feel like this was a terrible decision, mourning the loss of freedom and peace of mind of my old life.
At the same time though, I'm not planning on giving him back, at least not until there's been more time to really see how things develop as we get used to each other and the house. I don't think I could give back an animal without hating myself for years, even though I think he'd get picked up pretty easily again compared to the other cats there.
I know some people that would read this might think it's just selfishness, that's what I fear at least. But I'm the one here who really needs the most change in order for this to work out, and in order to ever feel like I'm better off after this than before it.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/dbflog/adopted_a_cat_5_days_ago_and_im_getting_really/
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