Hello Reddit, I have a 12 year old tabby cat named Tabitha (original, I know.) I adopted her when she was 8 weeks old; she was my first cat as an adult. Well, a non minor. She and I have an incredible bond. Only two months after, I adopted my other 12 year old domestic Russian blue mix. His name is Tom and he’s great. 9 years into their life I adopted Auri, and until about 9 months ago, they got along great. Suddenly, Tabby decided she absolutely hates anything that is not bipedal. She will love on any human all day long, but started gradually getting more and more volatile around my other cats. She was hiding away in the basement, behind my bed, in my closet. Eventually she stopped eating and one morning urinated behind my bed. As a cat lady I decided I would try a slow introduction. Her own place in the spare room, with her own feeding area (near the door to reintroduce to her old friends,) her litter box in there, a nice bed and scratcher and other things to keep her comfortable while we tried the reintroduction. Taking her to the vet, we found out...that she was amazingly healthy, just an old lady. She has normal biological markers and normal old kitty joint problems. She has gabapentin since then for anxiety, but that doesn’t help her coexist with my other furry friends. I have done the slow introduction to my other cats with no success. Her vet can’t find anything wrong, she just decided one day that she doesn’t like these cats she’s spent 3+ years around amicably and even favorably. As you can deduce, for several months she has stayed in the spare room. Besides the slow introduction I have also brought her out to a safe space in the cat carrier to be met with nothing but resistance even when her favorite treats are involved. I bring her out as frequently as I am able to close my bedroom door and let her sleep with me so she has prolonged human interaction. She also gets human interaction for a period every day. She has always been a fairly inactive kitty, but staying in there has made her more sedentary and it’s become difficult to control her weight which is not something I want for her. Granted, I have not changed her to diet food (on order currently, since decreased proportions have not helped thus far), as the rapid weight gain is a recent development. I spend a lot of time in her room just crying, just wanting for her to get along with the other two again because I have so much time and love invested in her and love her so much. It’s unfair to leave my 2 others in the same room to swap for her to roam free for space reasons. But also: she doesn’t seem unhappy. She doesn’t growl or shy away when I or my daughter visit and she can handle seeing the other cats on the other side of the door without attacking. When I take her to the vet they comment on how great she’s doing and how she still loves people. They don’t really have any advice at this point since the anxiety medication doesn’t work. She’s a grumpy old lady telling my other cats to get off her lawn. What I want is opinions on these topics: Is it wrong for me to leave her in our spare room even though she’s not displaying discontent? Short of a cat behavioral advisor who may not be able to fix stubborn senior cat ways, what else can I do to try and get my first and favorite kitty free roam? Do I have to choose between my other 2 cats and her? If she seems happy and always comes up for pets and love from humans am I still being cruel? Do I choose between giving her up (which is a huge emotional deterrent because I’ve been given so many years to be close to her) or giving up my other kitties (who also I’ve grown very close with and one is just as old?) The spare room is roughly 14x14 feet, very well maintained, she always seems happy when we visit, but is getting fatter and I’m wondering that my continued acquiescence into her appearing happy is making me cruel in letting her stay there. I’d do whatever is best for her despite how much my heart would hurt, I’m just scared and sad that I don’t have anyone I’d trust with such an angel who doesn’t have other quadrupeds. Please advise.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/jqsq5j/advice_for_my_senior_sweetheart/
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