So I am not prepared to give one up just yet, but any personal experiences with this or advice would be super helpful. I feel like I’m doing everything I can and have read every post and article about this with little to no progress.
This will be long, but I’ll try and be concise and give the facts.
4 1/2 months ago I adopted a 10 month old cat. She grew up in a foster home with lots of cats. She was advertised as very shy to people but liking other cats. I went to meet her twice before taking her home. She was a little shy but came out of her shell a bit. I was so in love with her and her calm playfulness.
I brought her home the end of August. She was very very shy, but after a month, warmed up to me a lot and now loves pets and playing and sitting in my lap and sleeping by me! In adopting her, her foster told me I’d have to adopt her with a second cat since she is so young and likes other cats. I was excited to have another kitten and maybe one that was more people friendly to bring her out of her shell.
A month after adopting Mica (older cat), I adopted Bee, a 4 month old playful kitten who was growing up with another kitten and 3 other older cats
I had never introduced two cats before but got a lot of advice from Mica’s foster and Bee’s foster and read up a lot on how to do it slowly. I separated them for two weeks, but because I live in a smaller apartment with 3 roommates, there’s not just a separate room that could be a cat room. So the kitten got our main room and Mica stayed in my room. I fed them treats under the door and played with toys with them under the door together and there was very very little if no hissing. I also switched them every once in a while to smell each others scent. All the steps.
First few in person introductions go ok, but my older cat gets this tense stare around the kitten. First meeting I play with both of them together and they stare at each other tensely, but they both play with a feather toy and it seems good. I let them do this again in my room and it goes well until my cat gets too close to the kitten (she was in a corner which was my fault for letting it be there) and they have a bad fight and run under the bed and there’s hissing and swatting and growling and very loud meowing. Like a tumbleweed of cat fight.
No one was hurt though. So I keep them separated for two weeks again and do more feeding by the door together. But it’s basically at the point now where if they get closer than 8” There’s this loud fight and Mica will more or less fixate on and pursue Bee. I’ve been feeding them morning and night on either side of a baby gate and they seem curious about each other but Bee will growl is Micro gets too close. Since doing that for a month, they’ve been better and now I do supervised time together. But if I didn’t intervene and steer Mica away when she gets close to Bee, there would be a fight and sometimes there still is if I don catch it in time.
I have high perches for Bee to escape to which she does and I use Feliway and play with both of them separately morning and night to fire them out. I switch their spaces and use catnip and do this same routine of play with each, feed on other side of the door then have supervised time together in the main room and they still fight.
It’s been 4 months and has gotten better for sure since the first introduction weeks, but I don’t feel hopeful of it getting better. Mica will often fixate on the kitten and try and touch her under my door and claw at my door if she knows Bee is near there. It seems more curious than straight out aggressive but it’s been months and not better.
MY QUESTION: how long do I try before possibly giving one back if they won’t get along? Ill always live in a small apartment and can’t keep two cats in separate rooms my whole life. even though I love Mica so much, she seems like the problem and if I had to give one up it would be her.
TLDR; have two adopted cats that have fought for months. How long do I wait before deciding it’s a lost cause and how do I go about giving one back?
Thanks!
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/eog192/adopted_cats_fightinghow_long_do_i_wait_before/
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