When I was 7, my parents bought the family a Norwich terrier. A family friend just had pups so it was a private exchange, not from a shelter or agency or breeder, we got her when she was maybe 2 weeks old. It was me (7), my sister (9), and my brother (<1) at the time and we had a laundry basket we kept her in the first few months, she was in the basket most of the day, maybe only 3 hours of play, 2-3hr for food, out, walks. The puppy was very cuddly, calm, collected. Once house trained, she roamed the house freely, no crate or anything, just a dog bed.
She passed when I was 16 and we got another Norwich terrier, this time from a breeder. At this point it was only my brother (10) and I (16), my sister had left. My brother didn't like dogs so it was mostly my dad and me who raised the pup. She was very similar to our first and we did the same routine: laundry basket most of the day, out for play, walks, food, out. Very calm, skittish, a wonderful lap dog. Again, freeroam when house trained.
She passed earlier this year, I'm 28 now. I live with my wife (28) and one daughter (2). Considering I had great personal experience with Norwich terriers, we got one ourselves. This is my "first dog" that I got on my own if that makes sense. Got her from a breeder and she's 17wk right now.
I'm having a hard time because while every dog is different, we didn't expect this one to be so different. I tried the laundry basket trick my family did growing up, and she just won't stay in one spot. We decided to try crating and she screams and cries all the time. I spoke to our vet and she said keeping her in the crate for 12-15hr every day is abuse. So we stopped using the crate for a few days, but she's not housebroken.
She's incredibly hyper, doesn't listen to commands, is inquisitive to a fault (eating anything and everything off the floor, incl. plastic toys my daughter has). She doesn't like pets (will bite softly) and absolutely is terrified of being held. We decided to put her back in the crate for most of the day for our sanity to be blunt. Whenever the dog is out, she has to be supervised, and it's draining on my wife and I.
If this is abuse, keeping her confined for most of the day, then I'm a bad dog owner, but I want to do better. I just really don't know how. I thought I was a pretty good owner as I loved my dogs, especially the one who recently passed. She was happy and healthy, loved to be pet and loved, the ideal lap dog, but this new one is stubborn and hyper, not something I've ever experienced before with a dog.
The moment she's house broken and learns to not eat inedible stuff off the floor is the moment we let her roam free around the house, just like my past dogs, but until that time I don't know what else to do other than what we've been doing.
I don't want to give up and rehome her, I don't want to fail like this. I love the dog but feel guilty for how she's being raised right now. How can I do better?
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/c2gwwn/im_a_bad_dog_owner_but_how_do_i_improve_things/
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