Any advice on how to deal with the guilt I feel towards my cats passing?
In hindsight I should have seen the signs. He was a big eater and would eat to the point of puking but he was also hyperthyroid and the vets prescribed him medicine that said would help normalize his appetite. When his eating habits changed (he started eating less and meowing for food less) I just thought it was from the meds.
Then he stopped eating one day. I thought it was just a hairball or something that would resolve itself. I brought him to the vet only when I realized he hadn't eaten for almost an entire 24h and found him sitting in his litter box, which he never did before. Its when I knew something was really wrong.
My guy was diagnosed with cancer in his stomach that was preventing him from keeping food down. His stomach lining was so thickened that they suspected the food couldn't actually get into his stomach.
Right now I'm struggling with the guilt I feel about not noticing the signs early on, but also the guilt I feel for leaving him in the vets.
He died after 4 days of IV fluids and a feeding tube surgery. The last day I visited him I really wanted to just take him home and let him pass with us at home.. but I opted instead to keep him there so the vet could keep trying to feed through the tube. They said they hadn't gotten the dosage down yet but that they had only tried twice.
At 1130 they called to tell me he had responded well to a particular dose and was a little more energetic. He passed that same night however, only a few hours later. He just stopped breathing.
He looked so sad and scared when I visited. I stayed for almost an hour and a half and during that time he started to be himself again. He laid his head down on my arms and I really wanted to just let him go.
I am having a really horrible time trying to feel okay with the decision I made to leave him there and keep trying to feed him. The vets did inform me that even if he were to survive the cancer was so far spread that he might not last long after that and quality of life couldn't be guaranteed. I still wanted to try and I just feel so guilty.
Sorry if this post is repetitive or not well written. This all happened in the last few days so I'm still reeling with guilt and grief.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/ayj6pu/feeling_guilty_over_my_cats_passing/
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