Hi all. I'd love to get some thoughts / opinions from folks who have raised kittens, and can share any insights with me. This past Friday I brought my Siberian kitten home with me, and I was soooo excited. I waited so long to get this kitten and he is literally the sweetest boy. His name is Milo, and all he wants to do is cuddle and be close by. Having him for 4 days now (which I know, sounds crazy), I really don't think I can take care of him as well as I thought. I know that inevitably people are going to judge me for this (I'm judging myself really hard too) and I'm doing my best to kind of cope with the guilt I'm feeling here, and I need some insights.
Let me start by saying that I love animals *so much*. I've always wanted a dog (and know that they're much more work) but it was something that I always knew that would happen later in life, when there was two people around to help care for it. I've worked really hard to make sure that one day when I bring home an animal, I am the absolute best fit for them. In the meantime, I talked to a few friends and they mentioned that they thought a cat would be an amazing addition to my lifestyle, especially through this pandemic (I live alone and see my "bubble" once a week at most). After months of research, I found a breed that made sense for my allergies, and I felt really confident about my ability to care for a kitten: my finances are good, I live on my own, and I have a lot of time to invest in an animal right now with working from home.
Despite how much I prepared and honestly how much I love him (I really do adore him, he's the sweetest), since bringing Milo home, I've not really been okay. I'm someone who really needs their space at home to be organized, and I thought I could manage some changes if I prepared, but having something else in here has disrupted me in ways that I didn't at all anticipate. I went into full blown shock, and haven't been able to really eat or drink anything, and I love to exercise, but I can't even think of it right now. I'm a complete anxious mess. I'm lucky I took the week off work, or I'd be totally dysfunctional. Also to reassure: the kitten is getting so much love and play and food -- he's thriving with constant attention so he's not in any harm staying with me right now.
I know it's only been a few days, so I'm not trying to make any hasty decisions, but I also just have the strongest gut feeling that this isn't the right choice for me right now. I have 7 days from the date I picked up the kitten to bring it back to the breeder, no questions asked. But there's also a few folks I know at work who would love to have a kitten, and would give it the best home if I wanted to rehome him myself. What I really want is what is best for the kitten, and I honestly thought I could be it. What I also know is that he also has so much energy, and I don't have the energy to match him right now that I thought I did.
Some of my friends keep telling me that this is a good adjustment for me, and that it's a good idea to wait it out and wait for the kitten to become a cat, where it will mellow out. In some ways, I do agree with that, and I know that in 6+ months or so to a year, I'd be soooo happy if I kept Milo and I know he'd make the biggest difference to my life. But I'm also not sure if I can manage through that, and that isn't even close to what's best for this little guy. He should be loved so much and unconditionally in the next year, not just waiting until I can un-fuck myself up from being in isolation.
Did anyone go through something similar? I'm really trying here to understand what my best, least-selfish choice is, and I'm really disappointed in myself that I feel I can't keep this commitment, when I pride myself on being a person who keeps and weighs a choice before I've made it.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/mpe6pr/i_need_advice_i_got_a_kitten_and_i_dont_know_if_i/
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