--------- PREFACE --------
Hey all, I like to think of my self as a total cat-person, and generally I ADORE cats - I just wanted to preface this because I'm having some pretty awful feelings right now and wanted to make perfectly clear that it's NOT the norm for me; my patience is just wearing VERY thin right now. Here is some details, but you can skip to the bottom of you don't think context would be necessary.
-------- DETAILS --------
So my fiancee and I have two cats - Oliver (2.5-3 years old, fixed male) and Ella (about 1.5 years old, unfixed female). Before continuing, I want to just say that I totally understand that she's WAY overdue for being fixed, we ran into severe financial issues though and just as our appointment was finally coming up, it was cancelled due to COVID-19 making it so only essential services are available from the vets in our area. Ever since we got her, she's been a bit of a sketchy cat- for the first month, she was intimidated of Ollie and spent most of her time hiding, and hissing and spitting violently at him. Just as we worried we may have to give her up, she finally started warming up to him and they eventually became very close, though she's always remained a VERY jumpy cat but from time to time can be very loving towards my fiancee and I.
Now, fast-forward to around November and obviously she's whining a TON very loudly and..er.. assuming the position every 2 feet, dragging herself around the carpet in donuts and making strange noises. Obviously, she was going into heat. We were still saving for her appointment so we couldn't get her in yet at the time and decided to bide our time. She has become increasingly moody it seems, and as of the last couple of months I can no longer trust her anymore. Many times I've picked her up to give her affection and she's appeared completely fine - only to suddenly make some messed up noises and start swinging at my face, something she NEVER used to do. She goes through phases now where she does the weird donut thing on the carpet, the howling and the position-assuming, and then phases where she seems not to be in heat anymore, but it doesn't seem to matter. I don't find her trust-worthy at ALL at ANY time anymore and she's prone to snapping randomly and becoming aggro, no matter when in the cycle she seems to be at.
What prompted this was tonight, I let her in our room after she had been out wandering the house for a bit, and she was meowing at me like she wanted attention. I talked to her a little and was trying to walk back to my desk, but she kept meowing and getting under-foot. I kept trying to side-step away and she started making those crazy angry noises again and tried to attack my foot and hissed and spat at me (though she ran away when I scared her off after she tried that).
------- THE QUESTION ------
My parents keep telling me that once cats are fixed, they become much nicer and more dosile, but I'm running out of patience now. My partner and I have been having some serious talks about it lately and have decided that we will likely give her away if her demeanor / trustworthiness doesn't improve drastically after being fixed. After some recent episodes including tonights and an other instance last night when she clapped my face with her claws), I don't want to waste $200 Canadian rubles getting her fixed if she's not going to be much friendlier and we end up giving her away afterwards.
Should we get her fixed and wait-and-see, or are the changes (if they even happen) likely to be too small to make up for what a NASTY cat she can be?
Thanks!
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/g07i5u/question_is_my_cat_going_to_be_any_friendlier_or/
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