LONG POST that requires explanation to avoid misunderstandings:
Hello everyone. I and my wife have four cats and one dog. The oldest of those cats was a wedding present to ourselves roughly 8.5 years ago. He was our first cat (and first pet) in our newly joined household. We'd both had several pets previously, so we went through the usual motions of transitioning him to the new house. Shortly after adopting him and bringing him home (approx. 2 or so weeks), he started to become less cuddly and very aggressive, often swiping and clawing and biting us.
So, we got a second cat thinking it would calm him down to have a companion, and it worked wonderfully. Cat #2 (a female) and Cat #1 (male) would cuddle and play and it was great. (I'm keeping the names of my pets out of this out of respect for my wife's and my anonymity)
Fast forward 2 or so years, and I get a new job which requires us to move out of state. Then we moved again after that. And again after that. And finally one more time, when we bought a house instead of renting - and that is where we are now.
Cat #1 grew increasingly more agitated with each move, understandably. It's not an easy process on a cat. But then my wife wanted to get another cat, thinking maybe a third companion would help things with Cat #1. So shortly after we bought the house, we got Cat #3. And a year later, Cat #4. Then our house got broken into and we got a pretty big dog as a burglar deterrent.
All of our animals are rescues. We don't get them from breeders. I say that because Cat #1 came from a rescue, who rescued him from a foster home that kept him in a cage 24/7 for probably around 4 months. He was poorly socialized and has a LOT of triggers that we had to learn over the years.
He's a legitimately difficult cat. He's lovable to us, but that's it. He will snuggle with us but it's always on his terms. He hates to be picked up and to be pet anywhere except his head (I'm permitted to pet his back, but only a few strokes before he voices his displeasure). He will attack visitors, and after the frequent moves, and the introduction of the new animals, he attacks the animals as well without provocation, including his once long-time snuggle buddy and playmate Cat #2. And most recently, he's attacked the dog (a roughly 90-pound dog, no less) and clawed her eye so that it bled, but thankfully it didn't cause any more serious damage.
So now we've reached a difficult decision, after 8 years of having him. Do we keep Cat #1 indoor? Do we transition him to be an outdoor cat? (He's long enjoyed outdoor excursions, which have been supervised, but he's also escaped a few times. He's always come back within a day to three days. And every time he escapes, the other animals noticeably calm down and relax while he's away.) Or do we give him to an adoption agency that has a program that provides homes to "part feral" cats to be barn cats, and the barn owners promise to take care of the animal?
I'm curious what people here might think and/or suggest. I have my opinion and my wife has hers, and we're both struggling with making a rational/logical decision and not giving in to our emotions. It's been a very emotional couple of days as we've been discussing it.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/hogrtb/difficult_decision_with_our_cat_indoor_vs_outdoor/
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