Hi everyone
I need help. My 18 year old cat died two days ago. Hes been with me all my life, and at times was my only friend. He had a good life and was definitely lucky overall.
Once hes health started to disappear and after several vet visits I had to let him go. I was a wreck leading up to it, but told myself to be strong for him. I was with him until the end and was petting him and looking into his eyes as he died. I had nothing planned for after he left though and was totally lost. The vet, who was very nice, asked about burial options and I didnt really react. Together with my father, who was also there, we somehow decided to leave him with the vet (I dont really remember this). I think I told myself that he was gone anyway and it was just a dead body. At night I felt horrible that he was still there. I suddenly wished I could have burried him in our garden where he always played and kinda be around us for a little while longer. I called the next day but they told me he was already gone to the animal disposal place.
I was really afraid that, if hes still around as a ghost or something, he wouldnt find his way home.
When I called the vet she told me that they would burn the corpses but on another website I found the information that the corpses are used in concrete manufacturing. Now I feel even more horrible (that his ashes will be in a road or something) and feel like a total traitor. Im a mess and I cant really sleep or do anything anymore. The rest of the family seems to take it much easier and for them the body doesnt matter. They say they remember him in their hearts and memories. But for me the thought of whats happens to the body and if my cat is still out there in some form or another is overwhelming. This death is hard enough and this whole thing about the body makes it extra hard for me. I dont now what i can do anymore, but it feels like i will regret this for the rest of my life.
Please help if you can and try to not be too harsh with me, im crying as i type this and am not super strong right now. Thanks so much for reading this
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/cuadm0/left_my_dead_cat_at_the_vet_and_feel_horrible/
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