Let me give you some context: I'm a minor, 16, and I'm disabled. I live with my two grandparents. We own a house across from us that I used to live in. Two cats lived there from when I lived there, though for reasons I don't feel comfortable disclosing, my parents no longer lived there and custody was given to my grandparents, so no one stayed there. It was fine for awhile, before I got sick. We'd go over every day, refill three food and water bowls, make sure they were alright, and spent about two hours playing with them. Then, when I got sick and couldn't go, my grandma started to go over less. I thought, ok, every other day and double the amount of food and water bowls. I trusted her, so I didn't really question it all that much.
Recently (about a month ago), I was only them well enough to be able to go to check on them. I wasn't really "well", though; she told me that she actually hadn't gone to feed them in a full MONTH. Of course, I panicked and ran over there. One of them was dead on the floor when I got in. She had let him starve to death, and I couldn't do anything about it. The other cat... we don't know where she is. She was always more cautious, kinda the alpha cat in the house but also kept to the shadows, only really came out for food and the occasional ear scritch, but if you scritched too long? Say goodbye to your skin. But we haven't found her.
My uncle came over today and told me that we can't get them cremated. This is a tradition in my family. My mother owned a family of cats who all turned out to have cancer, and every last one was cremated. She died around 6 years ago. The reason he gave me was that my grandparents would get arrested, and I would get put into foster care. This would be very bad for me, as aside from physical disabilities, I also have mental disabilities. The only other option I'd have is to be put with my abusive father, over 2.5K miles away. But I plan to get out of my town as soon as I am able, probably when I'm 18, as I have a friend who IS 18 who is moving into an apartment that is allowing one roommate next November. It'd still be a wait, but that's beside the point: I plan on getting out of here as soon as possible, and I don't want to bury them in a place that I have such bad memories in, that I'll probably never come back to again.
So, that's my dilemma. I'm a disabled minor, and I was sick and assumed my grandmother was feeding my cats, but she hadn't. By the time I found that out and went to see them, they were dead. I want to get them cremated, as it was a traditional my late mother had, and I don't plan on staying where I live long after I turn 18 so I'd rather take them with me than bury them where I'll never pay respects again. But I can't get them cremated, from what I've heard, because they would be arrested and I would be sent into foster care or to live with my abusive father, both bad choices as I am both mentally and physically disabled.
My question is... how can I get them cremated without all of this? I want to bring them with me, and if I bury them, I can't. But if I get them cremated, or try, it'll end in disaster. As much as I despise my grandma for letting this happen, I need her. If I take them to a vet to get cremated, they'll see they died from starvation. What do I do? There's no real "anonymous cremation" place, so how am I supposed to do this? Please help.
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from Pets https://www.reddit.com/r/Pets/comments/de85uw/advice_my_cats_died_and_i_cant_get_them_cremated/
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